How To Give Feedback that Isn’t Taken Personally
After speaking at a recent conference around ‘Building A Customer Focused Culture’ I had a very insightful discussion with a fantastic Customer Experience Leader.
He shared the story of one of his team leaders who had wonderful rapport and connection with her team, yet found it incredibly difficult to address a team member when they were not delivering the expected level of customer service. It filled her with dread and was something she actively avoided, therefore the behaviour continued and, in some cases, worsened.
In my experience of working with many leaders, this problem will occur if the leader sees giving feedback as personal. Equally, if feedback is delivered in a way that it is personal, there will be resistance. This is where first and foremost having clear service standards and behaviours in place is critical. When conversations need to be had about customer service performance, it always links back to the clearly documented and defined service standards and behaviours the organisation has in place.
I regularly work with organisations and teams helping them to create their service standards. This includes team and leadership buy in and input, which results in standards being more meaningful and embraced. Once the team is clear of the expected standards and behaviours, if they are not meeting these, there is nothing personal about it, there is simply an identified opportunity to improve. This is achieved through effective service coaching.
Service coaching is a skill and one that can be learned, practiced, and improved. During my training with leaders on how to deliver service coaching, I recommend starting every coaching conversation with building connection and a check-in to ensure there are not any external factors contributing to performance. I once asked an initial check-in question with a new team member who was not delivering the expected level of customer service performance only to find out she was going through a very messy separation with her children. After learning this, the direction of the coaching session and conversation had to change completely. It then became all about the support and care that we could offer her.
Service coaching is a critical leadership skill and it is so important that leaders are given the tools, mindset, and training around how to be an effective coach. There is an art and methodology around being able to provide meaningful coaching and feedback that doesn’t feel personal, rather, it is helpful and constructive and helps to shift performance and improve the customer experience. As an example, consider the following;
“You completely ignored the patient when they walked in, that is not good enough you need to greet our patients immediately.”
This statement contains a lot of ‘you’ language and can easily get someone offside. As an alternative;
“I noticed earlier that a patient came into the clinic that wasn’t acknowledged, as you know we greet each patient as soon as they walk in with eye contact and a smile even if we are on the phone. Did you happen to notice the patient when they came in?”
Just by stating the observed and expected behaviour then asking an open question, it becomes a conversation rather than being perceived as a personal attack. This conversation would then continue using the service coaching framework.
Exceptional leaders are also exceptional coaches and the role of any leader is focusing on helping their team to be the best they can be. Effective service coaching removes any element of ‘personal’ and instead provides a platform for open discussion, exploration and willingness to change to improve the customer experience.
